Inside this issue: Are You Going Crazy?
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Inside this issue: Are You Going Crazy? |
| Brought to you by: QUOTE OF THE WEEK: "In short, he so busied himself in his books that he spent
the nights reading from twilight till daybreak and the days
from dawn till dark; and so from little sleep and much reading
his brain dried up and he lost his wits."
RESOURCES OF THE WEEK: nonsensibility.com/
http://gradschool.about.com/
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Advanced Symptoms of Advanced DegreesAre you suffering from Terminal Graduate Paralysis (TGP), a chronic and debilitating disease that impairs dissertation progress and prevents finishing? Do you exhibit signs of Global Irony Syndrome (GIS)? This affective disorder, largely concentrated among humanities graduate students, is associated with sarcastic smirks, sneering banter and an ironic stance towards reality. Or are you experiencing symptoms of a Sycophancy-Authority Malady (SAM), a speech pathology rampant among doctoral candidates, and almost universal among students on the job market? SAM sufferers show a fawning and even idolatrous stance towards senior academics, but will ridicule those same authorities once they have left the room. These are just a few of the distressingly common mental health disorders described in a brilliant new publication, The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual for Graduate Students (DSMGS-1). This revolutionary tool helps shrinks like me diagnose and treat grad students who have been driven crazy by academia. The authors of the DSMGS, law professor Lawrence Douglas and philosophy professor Alexander George (both at Amherst College) clearly know nothing about psychiatry and are themselves suffering from severe personality disturbances. In spite of narcissistic compulsions to publish in areas far beyond their range of competence, Douglas and George have provided an enormously useful, research-based description of mental health syndromes common among graduate students of all disciplines. In addition to outlining the symptoms and prevalence of major disorders caused by academic pursuits, Douglas and George provide up-to-date, empirically validated treatment recommendations. For example, Global Irony Syndrome is sometimes cured with intensive viewing of It’s a Wonderful Life. Early stages of Terminal Graduate Paralysis sometimes respond to long nature walks in open farmland accompanied by a complete termination of parental financial support. On March 4th, the Chronicle of Higher Education published excerpts from
the DSMGS-1, Have fun,
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